According to Teen Violence Statistics, teens may feel the need to bully because:

It makes them feel like they are in control or that they are smart, strong, or better than others.
They want to fit in with a crowd.
They are afraid others will bully them if they aren’t bullies.
They see other people bullying.

Furthermore, the article states that bullying can have serious consequences for the teens who bully. Teens who bully are more likely to:

Drop out of school
Use drugs, tobacco, or alcohol
Get into fights
Vandalize property
Be convicted of a crime, especially if they are male
Abuse their spouse or children

Why kids choose to bully may vary, but as educators when speaking to our youth  we recognize an underlining factor for bullying: lack of self-confidence.

When youth believe that they are in fact good enough, smart enough, and capable of fulfilling their goals, the need to hurt others is no longer a factor. The need to fit in will not overpower them to harm others, they won’t be afraid to stand up for what they believe in and they know bullying others won’t prove that they are better in any way.

Regardless if others come from different backgrounds or are of a different sexual orientation, what’s important is to embed in each child and teen is the power to believe, respect and learn from their surroundings and peers. Self-confidence and self-awareness allows youth to respect their own person because of the power they possess to change and effect their lives and the lives of others. The need to do well, graduate high school and say no to bad choices, will in time become second nature.

At Kids Now, we believe that harvesting these emotional skills will not only help youth grow into successful leaders but also help the community as youth become more tolerant and compassionate of others.

Kids Now is extremely grateful for the hundreds of volunteers that energetically mentor students in grades 7 & 8 and help them develop life-success skills. On April 20, select mentors from the GTA were given an appreciation award for their outstanding work and commitment!

These mentors are:

Louise Spence, RBC
Terrence Chan, RBC
June Payne, RBC
Melissa Occhicone,  TD
Adrian Gomez, TELUS
Louise Leite
Laura Purdon, Jacob Boutique
Click on the video below to get a glimpse of the fun event.

Thank you once again to all of our mentors for their time, dedication and friendly smiles!

Jared Gillespie is one of our new mentors this season, volunteering his time at St. Charles Catholic School in Toronto. Jared is awesome. Read below to know why. Thank you, Jared.

Why did you want to be a mentor for the kids now program?

After coaching hockey for three years during my university education, I experienced how refreshing it is to put aside your schoolwork for a few hours and get involved in your community. Having made the decision to try something different than coaching hockey this year, I began searching other avenues of volunteering. My girlfriend, Laura Purdon, is a mentor with Kids Now and seemed to love the program more and more after each session. She suggested that I give it a try too. The ball got rolling with kids.now and I was placed at St. Charles School where I’m excited to get to work with the students every Tuesday!

What are some of the challenges and pressures grades 7 & 8 students face today?

Having presented a similar question to the students in my Kids Now group, I was given a firsthand account of some of the obstacles and pressures that students face in their final years of elementary school. The two most prominent responses from my group were getting accepted to a good secondary school and on a more personal level, maintaining friends and a strong social life. The Kids Now program is set up to assist students in dealing with such challenges. By offering activities that create time management, leadership and communication skills, our weekly sessions prepare these young adults for success in their upcoming transition to high school and beyond.

What has been the best thing you have learned from the program?

Involvement in the Kids Now program has allowed me to sharpen and build a variety of useful skills. Most important among these is feeling confident while presenting material to my group of students in an interesting and creative way. Leading the weekly discussion and keeping students engaged, energetic and thinking critically for 90 minutes after a full day of school can be a challenge. However, the freedom of the Kids Now material allows me to my add own spin to several of the activities. During a discussion with my group during the first session, I tried to get a sense of how they best absorb new information. The consensus among them seemed to be through skits and games. With this in mind, I try to use short plays and productions as the vehicle to pass on the lessons and messages within the kids.now material.

How has it helped you in understanding youth today?

Prior to starting with Kids Now, the only classroom I had been in for the last several years were large university rooms of usually hundreds of students. The lecturer spoke and the students took notes. In my opinion, not a lot of true learning can happen in this situation. Involvement with Kids Now has allowed for a refreshing and eye-opening opportunity to listen to students talk openly about a number of topics and often discover something new about themselves. The main takeaway for me, has been, talk less and listen more. They have so many insightful thoughts and once the ball is rolling, these young, intellectual individuals offer countless creative and thought provoking perspectives.

What skills have you improved?

The students at St. Charles School have taught me the importance of strong listening skills. After taking part in the first couple of sessions, I realized that the less I talk, the more willing the students are to fill the silence with creative, insightful points. In my opinion, continually chatting and leading the conversation is not the best way to allow these students to flourish. Witnessing first hand that when many of these students take the reigns on a topic, they make some very unique and creative connections that not only allows them to learn more effectively, but seems to encourage other members of the group to jump into the discussion and make their own connections as well.

Why do you think other adults should volunteer with the kids now program?

The Kids Now program is a great way to gain experience in a classroom setting while also getting to witness the immediate impact you can have in these children’s’ lives. Volunteering offers an escape from the stresses stemming from work and school and is a refreshing and rewarding weekly commitment. Not only do you get to make a difference in these 10 student’s lives, you will find yourself learning lessons from each of them on a weekly basis as well.

How will their lives and community benefit? Do you think that by volunteering you are having an impact on the students and society as a whole?

Drawing from my own experience, students in the Kids Now program are high achievers. They are destined for success and by involving themselves in extra-curricular programs, such as Kids Now, they are taking meaningful steps in the right direction to do great things as they enter into secondary school. These students will learn first hand the value of leadership and involvement not only inside their schools but within the community as well. It is my hope that as a Kids Now mentor, I can pass along the importance and practicality of the lessons conveyed through kids.now. By doing so, I feel confidently that these already high-achieving young individuals will be well prepared and motivated to use their skills to create positive change within their schools and communities around the Greater Toronto Area.

I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver. – Maya Angelou

We live in a fast paced world. More often than not, we rush to work, rush to pay the bills, rush home to cook dinner and then rush to bed to do it all over again the following morning. While these things must get done, it is also necessary to stop and give. Give to ourselves but more importantly give to others and the community we live in.

Why? Well because when we give, we live.

In Doug Lawson’s groundbreaking book, Give To Live, he cites research that shows that donating and volunteering can lead to improved health and emotional well-being. Some of the benefits include:

 Greater longevity
 Significant reduction in toxic stress chemicals in the body (therefore less stress)
 Enhanced functioning of the immune system
 Improved cardiovascular circulation
 Healthier sleep
 Enhanced quality of life
 Numerous other physical, emotional and spiritual benefits

As functioning members of this stress-driven society, we must take time to do things that deflect afflictions and bring about wholeness within ourselves and others. This doesn’t mean that we must give like celebrities or donate all of our time, but rather give in proportion to our ability to give. The ideal is quality gifts, not quantity.

At Kids Now, we believe that teaching our youth to be self-aware of their gifts and offering to help others will set them on a life to a healthy and successful life.

It is every man’s obligation to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it. – Albert Einstein

Are you ready to give?

This week we are more than pleased to introduce to you, Jevon Salerno. A Kids Now mentor last fall at Amesbury Middle School in Toronto, and a Kids Now participants 11 years ago. Jevon is a wonderful teacher and a Kids Now full circle success story . Please get to know her a little more.

Why did you want to be a mentor for the kids now program?

As a former Kids Now participant 11 years ago, I felt that the tools I learned and acquired from this 12 week program helped shape who I am today. Growing up I was very shy and introverted and I realized that I was missing out on a lot of experiences that I secretly longed to do. 11 years later, I got my honors degree and moved to Australia to become a teacher. The question is would I have done that if not for Kids Now? Probably not. I now work at a private school in Toronto and teach exceptional children. I personally believe that every student should be involved in this program because it teaches them the life skills that they desperately need in this 21st century.

What are some of the challenges and pressures grades 7 & 8 students face today?

Our society is continuously evolving and changing. 11 years ago we did not have blackberries, Ipads or Facebook. Rumors would spread word of mouth. Nowadays, rumors can spread in less than a minute by text message or ‘BBM’. Pictures can be distorted via programs and posted on Facebook. Children are faced with many hardships growing up in this digital world. Imagine being forced to change yourself just to fit in? Your child is probably facing that problem as we speak. Youtube is now being used to post updates of bullying or attempted suicides from it. These kids need to be prepared to not only stand up for themselves, but to think for themselves as well. I tell all my students, “fitting in is easy, the hard part is being different and being proud of it”.

What has been the best thing you have learned from the program?

Underneath all the boy/girl drama, the bullying, the facebook and ‘bbming’, they are all kids. I have also learned that we can learn a lot from them if we just take the time to listen to what they have to share and say.

In terms of bullying, a lot of these kids do not realize that they bully and tease one another every single day of their lives. I had to point it out to each and every one of them during our discussions. They were shocked when I told them of the Youtube clips of kids who were bullied and hurting from it.

How has it helped you in understanding youth today?

Youth today need a lot of guidance and redirection. If we stripped them of all their gadgets and they would not know how to communicate. Every 5 seconds they would try to text someone or tell me something about Facebook. If you put them in a room with 16 other teenagers and expect them to carry on a conversation about communication or goal setting, they would fail without our guidance. However, once they do have that ‘coaching’ they flourish and what they have to say is truly remarkable.

What skills have you improved?

I am more self-aware of what children have to face in middle school and high school. I empathize with them because I was a teenager and I did go through all those hardships, just in a different matter. I think that everyone needs to take the time and listen to their students, friends or children. You could make a huge difference in their lives without even knowing it.

Why do you think other adults should volunteer with the Kids Now program?

One hour, once a week could change these children’s lives for the good. Out of my 16 students, 3 or 4 of them only identified something that they liked about themselves – 3 or 4 of them! After the 12 week program, almost all of them could identify more than 3 things they liked about themselves. That’s the difference we can make.

How will their lives and community benefit? Do you think that by volunteering you are having an impact on the students and society as a whole?

I believe the first hurdle is making them believe that they can achieve anything if they put their mind to it. The second hurdle is having the confidence to take that risk to achieve it. If every student has access to this program, there would be a lot less violence, drug abuse and teen suicides. This program helps students realize that they can change for the better and it can only happen with volunteers.

Why did you want to be a mentor for the kids now program?

I enjoy being involved in my community. I am currently working with several volunteer organizations and working with kids I find very gratifying. 

What are some of the challenges and pressures grades 7 & 8 students face today?

Kids today face a number challenges, including: peer pressure, relationships, honesty, social media, and bullying. These are issues that they need guidance dealing with because it impacts them on a daily basis.

What has been the best thing you have learned from the program? 

The best thing I learned was how mature and thoughtful grades 7 & 8 can be. They are at critical age and they cannot be underestimated.

How has mentoring helped you in understanding youth today?

I am more tolerant and patient because I realize that they have much more to offer than I first thought.

What skills have you improved as a kids now mentor?

I have improved my listening, communication skills, empathy and self-awareness – just as we are teaching the kids!

Why do you think others should volunteer with the kids now program?

I believe that others should volunteer with kids now and receive a great sense of personal satisfaction and improved Emotional Intelligence.

Do you think that by volunteering you are having an impact on the students and society as a whole?

We are helping to shape the leaders of the future. What they learn in kids now will stay with them throughout their lives. They will apply their skills in their communities, with their familes, friends and work colleagues. The benefits to society are limitless.

We have fantastic mentors at kids now, and it’s time our friends, partners and parents get to know them too! Please learn more about Jana.

Why did you sign up to be a mentor?

I signed up to be a kids now mentor because I love spending time with kids. I had recently moved to Edmonton, I was looking for a place to volunteer and gain experience working with kids.

What has been your greatest reward from the kids now experience?

My greatest reward is knowing that I have made a positive difference in kids lives. Sometime the smallest things can make a big difference in a child’s life, and for kids in grade seven and eight, life can be rough, so having a positive role model is very important. It was rewarding to see a change in the kids over the 12 sessions, to see them grow more confident in themselves, but the most rewarding part was that the parents and kids noticed the difference too!

What have the kids taught you?

Kids have a unique and creative perspective on life, they often surprise you with insightful answers. They can give you a different and fresh perspective on life.

Why would you recommend this program to parents and others who are thinking of  volunteering?

I would recommend this program to other mentors because it is rewarding to have a positive impact on someone’s life. The kids are not the only who learn something from the program; as a mentor I gain a lot form working with the kids. The program challenged me, taught me something new, gave me more confidence, and I gained a few new friends.

Where possible, I gave them colourful pens to use. For the first few weeks, they tended to write the same things, so after that I challenged them to think of something that they hadn’t written before. Each week, I collected up the papers and kept them safe. For the last session, I put all of the statements of gratitude together into one big poster. I put the poster up on the wall during the session, and the kids enjoyed reading each one, seeing just how much they have to be thankful for. They seemed to enjoy the exercise, and hopefully this will inspire them to continue the practice on their own.

Helen Hayward – kids now Mentor